Last month, the Surgeon General issued an advisory on the mental health and well-being of parents.
It stated, “Parents have a profound impact on the health of our children and the health of society. Yet parents and caregivers today face tremendous pressures, from familiar stressors such as worrying about their kids’ health and safety and financial concerns, to new challenges like navigating technology and social media, a youth mental health crisis, and an epidemic of loneliness that has hit young people the hardest.” He backed up this claim by saying, “Over the last decade, parents have been consistently more likely to report experiencing high levels of stress compared to other adults.”
Insert: deep sigh.
I wholeheartedly appreciate the scientists, teachers, social workers, therapists and pioneers who are recognizing parents are dangerously close to needing crisis level intervention. Information and research is pivotal in helping us to evolve as a society, within our communities and even at the finite, individualized level of parenting. Thank goodness there are qualified people validating our feelings.
But after reading his statement, my only response was “No duh. Now what?”
The problem, or perhaps the biggest question to this conundrum is, “what is the solution?” We know the where, when, why and who. But WHAT do we do about it?
Because in the end, the majority of us want to be good citizens and members of our community, but our number one priority over everything else is to raise good people. To give our children a healthy and robust childhood, free of trauma and hardship. We are all trying our damndest here. And with every new piece of information, we must pivot, recognize a new problem, and tackle it head on as if our lives, or more importantly, their innocent little lives, depend on it.
Simple solutions are what we want, no, desperately NEED! Solutions like affordable, quality child care for working parents. Social media conglomerates deciding children are more important than profits, and not allowing kids on their sites. Preventing school shootings. Insurance companies gladly covering the cost of medical expenses rather than trying to bankrupt us. The list goes on, and on, and on.
The Surgeon General, our nation’s most highly regarded doctor, is calling for a shift in culture, policies and programs to ensure all parents and caregivers can thrive.
Thank you for allowing us to feel seen and heard. It is a great first step. I just wish it wasn’t up to us, as parents, providers, caretakers and role models to claw our way out of the hole by ourselves.
Where oh where, are the policy and change makers to help us?Because it sure doesn’t feel like they are anywhere in our corner. And we are too tired and stressed to take on the monumental task of fighting for what we deserve. For what our kids deserve.
We have enough to worry about. The Surgeon General said so!
One thing to take solace in, fellow moms, is that we are all in this together. And if you lay awake at night wondering if you are doing the right thing, you probably already are. Know there are millions of moms across the country feeling it too, and despite the toll it takes on us, our kids will be better off because of it. Because of us.
Hang in there.
