A Fear of Failure

I’ll be honest, the start of a new year always frustrates me. Social media is full of people making resolutions, making budgets, making menus … making plans. However, January usually finds me in a bit of a slump. The festivities of the past two months are over, the Christmas cookies are gone, and all that’s left is cold, snow, and more cold. (And, if you ate as many cookies as I did, about seven extra pounds and pants that are a bit too snug. ;-))

I am not a person who makes resolutions – mostly because I am not a person who KEEPS resolutions. It’s the fear of failure that keeps joining the rest of the world in vowing to eat better, do better, BE better in the coming year. I just know that, at some point, I will fall off of whatever resolution wagon I have hopped on, and I will feel like a failure … like I have let someone down (most of all, myself).

Two years ago, however, I discovered a new way of looking at resolutions. While catching up on my blogs via Google Reader (may she rest in peace) I came across the idea of One Little Word. I don’t really know when, or where, it originated (although some preliminary research led me to Ali Edwards). I don’t even remember on which blog I first read about the idea. What I do know is that I love it! I have shared this idea with some of my students for the past two years, and they have loved it, too.

For those who aren’t familiar with the concept: you choose a word for the new year, and it sort of becomes your mantra – something to work on, aspire to, meditate on, practice. My first year of participation was the year we were going through In-Vetro Fertilization, and I chose faith as my word. That turned out to be the perfect word for me that year as I spent seven months pregnant with twins, followed by seven weeks with twins in the NICU. The second year, my word was thoughtful. I have always been impressed by, and sort-of-in-awe of, thoughtful people; so, I aspired to be a bit more like that. I have to say, my thoughtful year was not nearly as successful as my faithful year 🙂 but I tried, nonetheless.

I have not yet selected my word for 2014. It isn’t for a lack of trying! I’m struggling this year … part of me thinks, “pick a word like healthy, and that can encompass working out, eating well, getting more sleep …” – but then it starts to feel a little too much like a resolution, and I hit the STOP button! Part of me thinks, “pick a word like ME” because you really need to stop leaving the house in yoga pants, no make-up, and your house slippers and start taking a little interest in how you look. But that feels a bit too selfish. 😉

The word I think I’ve finally settled on is simplify. It is something that will be difficult for me to do; but, it is something I need to do. I don’t really know what it means for me just yet, but it’s a word that keeps popping into my head so I feel like I should listen.

Simplify. I like it.

See? I’m already starting to feel a little better about January, just knowing what my focus will be. 🙂

If you had to choose, what would you pick as your “One Little Word” in 2014?