I get it. It’s my own fault for buying the darn thing to begin with. But if you saw the gleam in her eyes and heard her voice soften as my six year old coaxed cash out of my wallet to buy this lifelike baby doll toy – you would have bought it, too!
But come on! This thing has me stressed out.
First: my kid feeds this thing WAY too much. The toy eats more than my living-breathing children. Just this morning she ate three packets of broccoli ,and we are running out of food! So I’ve got to cancel some things because the rest of my day is planned out… waiting to see how long it takes for her to “digest” the “food.” The fine print should read: you will care for this thing while your kid is at school, and it does not come with the ever elusive and entirely necessary village of support.
The doll comes with one diaper that is NOT, I repeat NOT reusable. With duct tape, an old wash cloth and some imagination – I was able to manufacture a relatively fashionable reusable diaper for her before the broccoli incident of two hours ago sneaks up on us.
My daughter waved goodbye to me and her new doll as she boarded the school bus, I asked her “How long after a bottle does it take her to pee?” to which she responded: “She goes when I go. Because I’m the mother.” They are forever connected through the bond that only a robot doll from China and a little girl can share.
So be warned, mothers and fathers, perusing the toy aisle as a reward for good behavior in a store. This toy will require your time and attention. If you are smart – you will convince your child that a nice houseplant is really the way to go if they are looking to take on extra care taking responsibilities.
