Maybe I have fallen into the trap of a New Year’s resolution, or maybe I am just truly ready for a change. Either way, it’s time for me to take a leap of faith. I need to find myself again.
Eleven years of marriage and five kids later, I don’t who I am anymore. Some days, I look in a mirror, and I see a complete stranger. Somehow, I always put something or someone before me, and this has to be the time that the commitment is beyond words and more action. I am not giving up on me this time.
30 days of self-reflection, compassion, letting the past go, and building my self-esteem begin now. Here are a few new aspects I am incorporating into my life to help find myself again. Maybe they can help you start a list, too.
- Write or say a positive affirmation to myself every day.
- Give my time to others and find a way to pour positivity into them.
- Make plans with girlfriends and KEEP THEM!
- Continuing to study my Bible. It’s such a peaceful time for me.
- Have a weekly dance party with my kids. I know it sounds strange, but I need to brush up on my dance skills, get those extra steps in, and most of all, be silly with my kids!
- Accept that I can say “no” to something and not have mom or life guilt!
- Admit I need help and not be ashamed to take it.
- Be more present and create meaningful memories.
My biggest hurdle in all this newfound way of life: accountability. Making others in my life stick to what they say is easy, but to be honest, I am unsure of myself. In my mind, I know I can do this, but my heart is second-guessing my new second chance. But that is how fear is. It will creep up on you and make you change your plans. NOT THIS TIME!
I know there are going to be some hiccups along the way, and I am okay with giving myself some grace. The main goal is to find a better version of myself and not to over-analyze every aspect of my life. Fear, self-doubt, and mom guilt can no longer be in control of my life. I have to see past all that old stuff and concentrate on discovering new positive traits in my life.
Finding the new you is really more than a 30-day journey; it’s a faith-filled start. I hope this will guide someone else to start their own journey to a new and improved you.
